Let Him Lead...

Most of the time my art is a reflection of my heart. My emotions are like a roller coaster lately so the best thing for me to do in my grief is be cath"ART"ic!

I feel... I think... I spew! It keeps me sane. 

I have a horrible habit of overthinking things & letting little things become HUGE things after running through my imagination. My mind is always making "movies" of my life & future that do nothing but lead to false hopes and dreams. Call me crazy or out of control, it's the curse of a creative spirit I guess. My mind is always on the move. But, knowing my flaws well, I choose to switch the track over and get it right in a more positive & productive direction. 

I am disillusioned to believe that my dead-end hopes and dreams will go anywhere under my control. Nothing I envision alone ever turns put how I imagined! So why do I do it? Cause it is entertaining temporarily, but eventually painful. 

So, like I repeat to myself DAILY... 

let Him Lead!!!

I know this! But it sure is hard. But  once I have been let down by my own reality enough times, I realize if I relinquish my dreams to His plan... He has something better planned that is beyond my wildest dreams! I just have to let go of the steering and trust His breath & light to blow my sail & light my way. 

Prune my Passions of Gardener of Grace...

As each day passes in my life, I am filled with passions and dreams.

Reflectingly stopping to think what each one means...

Some of them are selfish and work thier way in

usually giving birth to sin.

Some seem good and pure, but I am never sure.

So I thougtfully still my heart and pray

this prayer of true trust every day.

Cause giving Him control of our heart's desires

is a sweet sacrifice from our offering fires.

A heart can be foolish if we let it go free

without giving Him time on our knee

and asking him to allign it's  beat

with the ryhthm He taps with His mighty feet.

 

 

 

MY PASSION PRAYER

As I lay and look above, I know I see your tender hand

ready to change the composition of this thriving land.

You have my complete and sincere trust

to cultivate the soil within my beating bust.

You see what I want but know what I need

I hand you the shovel and you take lead.

My passion are deeply rooted inside

some selfish blooms I cannot hide.

You know my heart and all within,

Open my flesh and remove the sin.

Uproot the prickly strangling weeds

and replace them with your blessed seeds.

Kill my dreams and make them yours

and on them now your warm light pours.

Nourish them and make them grow

only then will I have peace to know

that what blooms inside is your plan for me

a fragrant wind of your desire for me.

 

 

I talk about this idea in my Diaries of a Young Widow on

YouTube "Praying for my Passions" Vlog...

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDoF_x-YLCo

 

Sketch for Final coloring

 

 

 

 

 

Wrapped in the Stillness of Him...

 

I fight my nights with a restless imagination, 

and my LONG days are filled with day dreams of silly possible circumstances...

 just think think thinking or what is to come.

What is His plan?

What is up his big giant sleeve?

I trust His plan, yes, but... I want to know His plan RIGHT NOW!

So, I was feeling this way for weeks and finally decided that God is not happy with me.

I pray and tell Him what I desire, then He wants me to just let it go to him. 

He will either make them come true, or has something better than I imagined. 

So, I have felt Him telling me to just rest in Him. He wants me to see this time as a special time to just be with him. He wants me to enjoy and look forward to our intimate quiet time, just as I would with my husband. It should be what I look forward to, what I make time for, and my deepest desire. 

When I do get down and rest with Him, it gives my restless heart a deep peace. 

I never regret time alone with him, but I do regret it when I don't have it.

When the Lord speaks to my soul, he gives me pictures. He knows how I see and how I learn. 

He have me an image of a butterfly pupa, just still and protected. It appears to be doing nothing, but there is a greater change forming inside. Something miraculous is happening that the human eye cannot see. It is a time alone and secret with the Great Creator, the transformer. 

He is making me into something new after this great tragedy. I was happily married for 10 wonderful years to my best friend. These were times I was fat in spirit, eating wildly my leaves of happiness. Then all of a sudden, things changed. 

I was moved into a different lifestyle in the blink of an eye. Now that my eyes are adjusted to this new light, I can see where God is taking me... but slowly it is revealed.

These Verses have brought great comfort to me in my time of restlessness...

May you be blessed by them too.

________________________________________________________________

2 Corinthians 4:18

 While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.

1 Peter 5:6-7

  Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. 

Psalm 27:5

 For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock.

Psalm 37:7

 Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.

Psalm 46:10

 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

Exodus 14:13

And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you to day: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen to day, ye shall see them again no more for ever.

Matthew 11:28-30

Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

www.biblegateway.com 

 I have had this feeling before, but as a married woman. 

Read this post to see how this fast paced world can ruin our spirit...

Hamster on a Wheel, be still...

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/search?q=be+still+

After my loss of my husband, I was searching for an answer. 

I wanted to see my road...

Where is my Yellow Brick Road?

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/2013/08/where-is-my-yellow-brick-road.html

 I finally understood the meaning of this place I am in... 

as  a new single mom, I was feeling totally lost.

But God is Our Compass!

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/2013/09/the-lord-is-our-compass.html

Here you can see my strange stages of grief, ranging from happy to sad, to confused, to lonely, to content...

A journey of a widow is definitely a Roller Coaster!

Diary of a Young Widow.

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/2013/08/diary-of-young-widow.html

 

 

Cocoon of Change...

I have been so anxious (since recently being widowed) to see what God has in store. I knew, even though unexpected, that Shannon's (my husband) death was the will of God. I had a peace that passes understanding and He is comforting me through my grief. I know He is present every second of my day. I know He has plans, but I can't help to roll around on sleepless nights just fantasizing about what is to come. I make up these stories in my head of all kinds of thing that COULD happen. Till a part of me gets restlessly impatient with Him and says, "God, HURRY UP!". Then I have to get back and check and remember that He has his perfect timing. He knows my end and my beginning and how best it is arranged. He makes my path straight and lit for me...

Here is my thoughts on His advice to me...

 

Cocoon of Change...

 

Sit tight and rest in your cocoon

being wrapped in my loving embrace

Allow my warmth to soften you

and let my hands to mold you anew.

What you were before was just the start,

you were content with your belly full of leaves

but now it's time for a change.

Part of life is growing and it requires change,

trust me with the pains that may come from it.

I know you feel the change coming

and are excited for your wings,

but slow your squirming for a while.

Be patient for a bit...

enjoy the miraculous process of what I am doing now.

Breathe deep and soak in my light.

The plans I have require strength, tools, and skills

you have not yet acquired.

So, let me nourish you in this state

and you will be amazed.

Crawl into my cocoon of comfort and let me cradle you

till your every squirm as been relaxed and you fall fast asleep.

I love you so much and can't wait to see

your face when I am through.

Cause that's when you will realize

that I know best for you.

You will see the light more strongly waiting there for you

and the new gifts I will have sewn on you

will help you soar so free.

But for now I want you to close your eyes, rest your fears,

and trust my molding hands.

Be Still, Be Quiet, Be Mine...


Below are previous colore pencil drawings I had created
that relate to the words above...

WIngs to Fly

 

 

 The Maker Molds

Click here to see the poetry to go with the two Jesus Illustrations above...

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/p/poetry-by-me.html

 

These below images are pictures from my book,

The Lost Sock

 

Click here to see more of the roller coaster of emotions a widow goes through

while being fastened in with a seat belt of faith...

http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/2013/08/diary-of-young-widow.html

 

He Holds Tomorrow...

Art and Poem by

Tabitha Seaton

Give thanks for all the blessings you hold today

for tomorrow they may not stay.

Live your life one day at a time

being prepared for the tough climb.

Gain strength for this climb from the One above

who freely gives his power with love.

When in time we don't understand

He holds us in His strong but gentle hand. 

Don't worry about the coming of morrow.

There's no need to beg and borrow.

Today you may hold pennies and dimes
in these slow and humble times, 

but tomorrow He may bring Heaven's gold.
For His endless treasures are untold.

Just trust in Him and He will prove His strength

If you hold on for one more length.

The hands that created you 

are the hands that bring hope to new.

He holds the morrow in His palm

For it's His love that causes the storm to calm.

See other related post, poems, and artwork here
http://thelostsocklife.blogspot.com/2013/03/hamster-on-wheel-art-and-poetry.html